Friday, July 31, 2009
New Blog
Beginning--tomorrow--this blog is undergoing a facelift! That's right. It's time for something new! It's time to bring on what we've all been needing in our lives lately--change. And consistency. Is that possible? Yes it is. We're about to experience a seachange here at the MooseBlog, a change which will set us on a new course. MooseBlog will here on out be an oracle, a voice from the present about the future. Actually, it'll be a voice from the present of the present. This is the unemployment blog, the blog of the post-graduate wastrel. Get ready. It's going to be a rollercoaster of love, loafing, and loitering. It's going to be full of ennui, existential angst, and philosophical musings on the nature of (un)happiness, the best kind of budget alcohol to drown your unemployed blues in, and how a day in the life of MooseBlog is best spent. This is a blog for the everyman and the almost man. I hope you enjoy.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Salutation
SPRING HAS SPRUNG! Rejoice and be glad, for the wind blows warm, the ground is thawed, and every space--subterranean, terrestrial, arboreal, atmospheric--bursts with the promise of new life and reunion with that generous source, the sun. Welcome back, old friend.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Michigan's Stimulus Package
Link to official document for President's approval forthcoming.
(semi-related: http://www.mlive.com/news/index.ssf/2008/01/deal_near_on_economic_stimulus.html)
In case you're interested in seeing (in a very general, not very helpful way) where our stimulus money is going, I've attached the plan our Senators (MI) sent to our president today, in the hopes that he'd grace the bill with his mighty pen and let the floodgates open--COME, GREEN!
I wonder if the descriptions listed indicate the level of thought and planning that went into the actual project proposals. If so (which is my suspicion) 'might help explain why money's not used very efficiently in this country, especially on the governmental level. On that note:
You'll be delighted to learn that the Upper Peninsula interoperability radio communications consortium--the Midwest's front line of defense against northern aggressors--is getting $500,000 from the Michigan stimulus package.
Inside sources say the old radio system picked up whispered messages from a snow bunker in a 200-year-old white pine forest in Canada about an upcoming invasion, but the UP antenna was so bent that our dutiful American protectors (Michigan Militia, Communications Unit?) were unable to hear when this invasion from the Great White North was to take place, even after holding a large conch shell to the speakers.
Mike Mahoney said, "I couldn't hear nothing but quail-calls, clinking beer bottles, and the faraway sound of a grizzly, a coyote, a narwhal, and a moose, all serenading the moon in harmony as they practiced for the Great White North Animal A Capella Competition. [Tomorrow at noon p.m. central eastern western time on GreatWhiteNorthLocalAccess.] Mahoney added: "Oh. And the ocean. I could hear the ocean too."
Just hours after giving this interview, Mr. Mahoney was found dead in a lodge in Houghton, UP, his head severely dented by what appear to be hoof prints, "Likely caribou," says animal-crime forensics expert, Dirk Disraeli.
If you fear Canada as much as I do (i.e. almost as much as I fear Gandalf after one of his 3-day benders--crazy wizard!), you know just how important this new system is. Think of the children for crissakes!
Meanwhile, at a press conference with democratic Michigan Senator, Senator Shingle, we learn:
Sustainable agriculture--a backwards concept if there ever was one--gets zilch. "Sustainable?" you ask. 'Sounds scary. Shingle thinks so too:
"If we're sustainable, what excuses will we have to ask for millions in cleanup projects that we give to our contracting buddies? How could we continue to fellate our benefactors in industrial agriculture," wonders Senator Shingle (D-Michigan).
"Hundreds of thousands of vegetable consumers would suddenly stop ingesting inorganic compounds that industrial agriculture pumps into produce, and these consumers might develop fewer health problems--what of the field of medicine?"
"Thousands of pharmaceutical jobs could be lost!" Shingle asserts, pounding his fists on the podium. :Research jobs employing hundreds in the interests of finding solutions to preventable problems will fall away like so many lice off a drowning dog."
"And if sustainable practices were to become the norm," Senator Shingle continues, in his rhetorical quest for the truth, "we might stop thinking of nature as the enemy! But obviously, if we're to be a unified state (and the best country in the universe), we need to have a common villain, and who better than that bitch, Nature?
"And anyway, who farms these days?" Shingle asks. "Why would anybody want to when we all know that food automatically grows in the grocery store [that's why it's called the GROcery store--duh!])"
So why is all of this important?
I answer you thus: For the above-mentioned reasons (which Senator Shingle has so astutely pointed out to the public), and so many more, the entire state of Michigan will receive a whopping $266,000 to go toward the development of sustainable agriculture. This money has already been assigned to cover the costs associated with the creation of a few upscale parks in northern Oakland County. The parks will be equipped with solar-panel-powered lighting and one tomato plant each. Nice, Michigan. Way to be.
Love to all,
Aaron
P.S. This message was supported by Lucky's Kitchen, a quaint little restaurant dedicated to providing cheep, mysteriously addictive "Chinese Food" to hungry college students and construction workers all over the Ann Arbor metropolitan area (read: within a 5 block radius of the Diag). Without Lucky's, I wouldn't feel nearly as lucky as I do right now.
P.P.S For more information on the UP interoperatbility radio communications consortium (which isn't even what it's called), go here.
(semi-related: http://www.mlive.com/news/index.ssf/2008/01/deal_near_on_economic_stimulus.html)
In case you're interested in seeing (in a very general, not very helpful way) where our stimulus money is going, I've attached the plan our Senators (MI) sent to our president today, in the hopes that he'd grace the bill with his mighty pen and let the floodgates open--COME, GREEN!
I wonder if the descriptions listed indicate the level of thought and planning that went into the actual project proposals. If so (which is my suspicion) 'might help explain why money's not used very efficiently in this country, especially on the governmental level. On that note:
You'll be delighted to learn that the Upper Peninsula interoperability radio communications consortium--the Midwest's front line of defense against northern aggressors--is getting $500,000 from the Michigan stimulus package.
Inside sources say the old radio system picked up whispered messages from a snow bunker in a 200-year-old white pine forest in Canada about an upcoming invasion, but the UP antenna was so bent that our dutiful American protectors (Michigan Militia, Communications Unit?) were unable to hear when this invasion from the Great White North was to take place, even after holding a large conch shell to the speakers.
Mike Mahoney said, "I couldn't hear nothing but quail-calls, clinking beer bottles, and the faraway sound of a grizzly, a coyote, a narwhal, and a moose, all serenading the moon in harmony as they practiced for the Great White North Animal A Capella Competition. [Tomorrow at noon p.m. central eastern western time on GreatWhiteNorthLocalAccess.] Mahoney added: "Oh. And the ocean. I could hear the ocean too."
Just hours after giving this interview, Mr. Mahoney was found dead in a lodge in Houghton, UP, his head severely dented by what appear to be hoof prints, "Likely caribou," says animal-crime forensics expert, Dirk Disraeli.
If you fear Canada as much as I do (i.e. almost as much as I fear Gandalf after one of his 3-day benders--crazy wizard!), you know just how important this new system is. Think of the children for crissakes!
Meanwhile, at a press conference with democratic Michigan Senator, Senator Shingle, we learn:
Sustainable agriculture--a backwards concept if there ever was one--gets zilch. "Sustainable?" you ask. 'Sounds scary. Shingle thinks so too:
"If we're sustainable, what excuses will we have to ask for millions in cleanup projects that we give to our contracting buddies? How could we continue to fellate our benefactors in industrial agriculture," wonders Senator Shingle (D-Michigan).
"Hundreds of thousands of vegetable consumers would suddenly stop ingesting inorganic compounds that industrial agriculture pumps into produce, and these consumers might develop fewer health problems--what of the field of medicine?"
"Thousands of pharmaceutical jobs could be lost!" Shingle asserts, pounding his fists on the podium. :Research jobs employing hundreds in the interests of finding solutions to preventable problems will fall away like so many lice off a drowning dog."
"And if sustainable practices were to become the norm," Senator Shingle continues, in his rhetorical quest for the truth, "we might stop thinking of nature as the enemy! But obviously, if we're to be a unified state (and the best country in the universe), we need to have a common villain, and who better than that bitch, Nature?
"And anyway, who farms these days?" Shingle asks. "Why would anybody want to when we all know that food automatically grows in the grocery store [that's why it's called the GROcery store--duh!])"
So why is all of this important?
I answer you thus: For the above-mentioned reasons (which Senator Shingle has so astutely pointed out to the public), and so many more, the entire state of Michigan will receive a whopping $266,000 to go toward the development of sustainable agriculture. This money has already been assigned to cover the costs associated with the creation of a few upscale parks in northern Oakland County. The parks will be equipped with solar-panel-powered lighting and one tomato plant each. Nice, Michigan. Way to be.
Love to all,
Aaron
P.S. This message was supported by Lucky's Kitchen, a quaint little restaurant dedicated to providing cheep, mysteriously addictive "Chinese Food" to hungry college students and construction workers all over the Ann Arbor metropolitan area (read: within a 5 block radius of the Diag). Without Lucky's, I wouldn't feel nearly as lucky as I do right now.
P.P.S For more information on the UP interoperatbility radio communications consortium (which isn't even what it's called), go here.
Volver - Estrella Morente
Excellent Spanish song (originally by Carlos Gardel, 1935), converted to this kinda-sorta-flamenco form by Estrella Morente and here performed by Estrella Morente
Real version by Estrella Morente: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upsF0jpz4kg&feature=related
There's also a terribly lip-synced but more visually appealing 1:32 long version by a sexy Penelope Cruz in Almodovar's "Volver." Short version from the film here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_NODJbKyZ4
Yo adivino el parpadeo/I see the flicker
de las luces que a lo lejos/of the faraway lights
van marcando mi retorno./that mark my return
Son las mismas que alumbraron/They're the same lights that illuminated
con sus pálidos reflejos/ with their pallid reflections
hondas horas de dolor./ hours of profound pain
Y aunque no quise el regreso/And although I do not want it back
siempre se vuelve/it always returns
al primer amor./to that first love
La vieja calle/ The old street
donde me cobijo/where I took refuge
tuya es su vida/(yours is your life
tuyo es su querer./yours is your love)[?]
Bajo el burlón/ under the mocking
mirar de las estrellas/gaze of the stars,
que con indiferencia/ which with indifference,
hoy me ven volver./ watch me return today
Volver/ Returning
con la frente marchita/ With my forehead shriveled
las nieves del tiempo/ The snows of time
platearon mi sien./ have silvered my hair
Sentir/ Feeling
que es un soplo la vida/ That life is but a (murmur/gust/breath)
que veinte años no es nada/ That twenty years is nothing
que febril la mirada/ how feverish the look,
errante en las sombras/ faraway in the shadows,
te busca y te nombra./ It calls you and names you
Vivir/ Living
con el alma aferrada/ With soul clinging
a un dulce recuerdo/ to a sweet memory
que lloro otra vez./so I cry once again
Tengo miedo del encuentro/ I fear the encounter
con el pasado que vuelve/ with the past (now returning)
a enfrentarse con mi vida./ facing my life
Tengo miedo de las noches/ I'm afraid of the nights,
que pobladas de recuerdos/ peopled with memories,
encadenen mi soñar./ that chain my dreams
Pero el viajero que huye/ But the traveler who runs
tarde o temprano/ early or late
detiene su andar./ [inevitably] stops his running
Y aunque el olvido/ And although forgetting,
que todo destruye/ which destroys everything,
haya matado mi vieja ilusión,/ has killed my old dream
guardo escondida/ I secretly guard
una esperanza humilde/ a humble hope,
que es toda la fortuna/a hope that is the only treasure
de mi corazón./ of my heart.
Volver/ Returning
con la frente marchita/ With a withered forehead
las nieves del tiempo/ the snows of time
platearon mi sien./ have silvered my hair.
Sentir/ Feeling
que es un soplo la vida/ that life is but a breath
que veinte años no es nada/ that twenty years is nothing
que febril la mirada/ how feverish the glance
errante en las sombras/ hiding in the shadows
te busca y te nombra./ it looks for you and names you
Vivir/ living
con el alma aferrada/ with my soul clinging
a un dulce recuerdo/ to a sweet memory
que lloro otra vez./ so I cry once again.
Real version by Estrella Morente: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upsF0jpz4kg&feature=related
There's also a terribly lip-synced but more visually appealing 1:32 long version by a sexy Penelope Cruz in Almodovar's "Volver." Short version from the film here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_NODJbKyZ4
Yo adivino el parpadeo/I see the flicker
de las luces que a lo lejos/of the faraway lights
van marcando mi retorno./that mark my return
Son las mismas que alumbraron/They're the same lights that illuminated
con sus pálidos reflejos/ with their pallid reflections
hondas horas de dolor./ hours of profound pain
Y aunque no quise el regreso/And although I do not want it back
siempre se vuelve/it always returns
al primer amor./to that first love
La vieja calle/ The old street
donde me cobijo/where I took refuge
tuya es su vida/(yours is your life
tuyo es su querer./yours is your love)[?]
Bajo el burlón/ under the mocking
mirar de las estrellas/gaze of the stars,
que con indiferencia/ which with indifference,
hoy me ven volver./ watch me return today
Volver/ Returning
con la frente marchita/ With my forehead shriveled
las nieves del tiempo/ The snows of time
platearon mi sien./ have silvered my hair
Sentir/ Feeling
que es un soplo la vida/ That life is but a (murmur/gust/breath)
que veinte años no es nada/ That twenty years is nothing
que febril la mirada/ how feverish the look,
errante en las sombras/ faraway in the shadows,
te busca y te nombra./ It calls you and names you
Vivir/ Living
con el alma aferrada/ With soul clinging
a un dulce recuerdo/ to a sweet memory
que lloro otra vez./so I cry once again
Tengo miedo del encuentro/ I fear the encounter
con el pasado que vuelve/ with the past (now returning)
a enfrentarse con mi vida./ facing my life
Tengo miedo de las noches/ I'm afraid of the nights,
que pobladas de recuerdos/ peopled with memories,
encadenen mi soñar./ that chain my dreams
Pero el viajero que huye/ But the traveler who runs
tarde o temprano/ early or late
detiene su andar./ [inevitably] stops his running
Y aunque el olvido/ And although forgetting,
que todo destruye/ which destroys everything,
haya matado mi vieja ilusión,/ has killed my old dream
guardo escondida/ I secretly guard
una esperanza humilde/ a humble hope,
que es toda la fortuna/a hope that is the only treasure
de mi corazón./ of my heart.
Volver/ Returning
con la frente marchita/ With a withered forehead
las nieves del tiempo/ the snows of time
platearon mi sien./ have silvered my hair.
Sentir/ Feeling
que es un soplo la vida/ that life is but a breath
que veinte años no es nada/ that twenty years is nothing
que febril la mirada/ how feverish the glance
errante en las sombras/ hiding in the shadows
te busca y te nombra./ it looks for you and names you
Vivir/ living
con el alma aferrada/ with my soul clinging
a un dulce recuerdo/ to a sweet memory
que lloro otra vez./ so I cry once again.
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